Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Knee Pads

When websites and blogs describe the basic uniform of a macho dancer, they often mention three things -- sando or wife beaters, boxer briefs / short shorts, and the infamous high boots. These are the obvious and basic things one sees, worn by almost all macho dancers in all macho dancing bars / gay bars / strip clubs.

What they always forget though is the one most important piece of garment any macho dancer must have, from a newbie of nineteen to an aging retiring dancer aged thirty plus -- the knee pads.

Comes in two colors -- white or black.
Note: Actual macho dancers have hairier and more muscular legs than the models above.

No one actually notices this piece of garment unless one asks the dancer or really observes. The knee pads look inconspicuous as they're partially hidden by the high leather boots.

The main reason for using is quite obvious. It protects their knees when they kneel on the stage floor when doing their macho moves. Imagine this quite difficult macho routine as an example (with background music - Aerosmith's "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing"):
At 2nd chorus before the bridge, when Steven Tyler sings "I don't wanna close my eyes / I don't wanna fall asleep", from a standing position, they suddenly kneel on their left knee as they twirl their arms above their heads. At "Cause I miss you baby / And I don't wanna miss a thing", they shift to kneel on their right knee, then rotate on the right knee to face the back of the stage. Then at "Cause even when I dream of you / the sweetest thing will never do", they will kneel on both knees then bend backwards as if lying face-up on the ground (while rolling their two arms - infamous macho dance move), then raise themselves using their knees. At "I still miss you baby / And I don't wanna miss a thing" , they rotate again to face the audience, do a snake-like gyration. Then at the bridge "I don't wanna miss one smile / I don't wanna miss one kiss", they will lie facing the ground, dry humping it as if to simulate sex... just using their hands and knees on the ground. They do this for most of the bridge until the high note of "for all the rest of time". Then they stand up before the last chorus.   
Their knee pads may protect them when they're dancing on stage, but these can become really uncomfortable, according to these dancers. This is most true when they are seated and tabled with the customer, as the knees become sweaty and warm underneath these pads. If not washed regularly, these too become itchy when worn. The dancers can't remove these after each dance, as it will involve removing their high boots and unfastening and re-fastening all the buckles per boot. So they just keep them on, until they are called for their next stage performance.

So if you, as a customer, want to impress a newbie, ask him if he already has his pair of knee pads. If not, you may want to buy him some. Because for sure, he will priortize investing on the three basics I mentioned earlier -- new sandos, new boxer briefs, and those high leather boots, which are rather quite expensive (P5K - P7K). Just a thought, if you have the means, why not pay for all these as well?

GB Goer
Learn more: Lessons from Gay Bars in Manila
email:; Follow at twitter: @gbgoer

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