Time In, Arriving Late

After arriving in Manila last night from a business trip, I wanted to grab some dinner before going home. My two friends, Mary and Ringo*, were already in their respective homes as it was already past 9 PM on a work night. So I had another option -- meet up with a macho dancer before he goes to work.

Yeah it might be a bit far-fetched idea, like "where did that come from?" or "huh, of all the people you could have dinner with?" But having a hunky or cute guy to accompany you to eat didn't sound too bad. I just had to pay for his meal, nothing more. 

I invited Russell*, who has been my dinner partner a few times already. I knew he was still available at that time. In our previous dinner, we started around 1030 PM and he went to the bar around 1130 already, 30 minutes late. So inviting him for dinner that late a night didn't worry me that much...

What's With The Chicken Lauriat?

It never fails. That specific dish.

When I meet up with a macho dancer outside of a gay bar, I usually invite him for a meal, like for dinner before he goes to work. For dinner with these less-than-privileged men, I am expecting to foot the bill for the both of us, so I am prepared to spend quite a sum for our meal. And as with dates, I always ask him beforehand where he wants to eat. 

Anywhere. Their standard reply.

After a few more questions to squeeze out where they really want to eat, after some minutes of walking around the mall or driving around the city, they reply with a specific place in mind.

Chowking.

No, seriously, I tell my date. I am prepared to spend some money.

Chowking, he does insist.

Even when I present him options. There's Italianni's at the side, a Jollibee store, a Japanese restaurant, and an American casual diner. Or even when I am driving him to his bar before work, where I can park my car at any establishment. Or even in the mall, where he can choose from any restaurant in that whole building. 

Whoever macho dancer or hosto I am with, they say Chowking. Always. Well, okay, let me admit, it's just like 5 or 6 out of the ten times, that particular Chinese-style mass fastfood is their choice, when asked what they want. The others were the other Filipino fast food chains like Jollibee or Mang Inasal, or the nearby local Filipino mini-restaurant like Binalot or Aristocrat (no, not karinderya).

As to why they prefer Chowking and not a more expensive place to go to, even if they know I am paying, I am not sure if it's hiya, as not for me to spend a lot for them. It can also be intimidation factor, with going inside a fancy expensive place -- not knowing what to get because they don' understand the names of the dishes, which of the items on the picture tastes good, how to act or eat appropriately inside. There's also less risk involved with food that is familiar, that is ordered before, that one is assured of a good meal especially if it's free. Maybe they don't want to waste good money for a meal they aren't assured if it will taste good (especially for the more exotic Japanese cuisine). 

Fine, so then we go inside.

As we're waiting in line and look at the lighted menu on top of the cash registry, I ask him which dish he'd like to get. The macho dancer with me at first looks puzzled what to get, as if he's having a hard time choosing. But then, after asking again what he wants, he orders this: 

Yes, it's the Chowking Chicken Lauriat. The value / combo meal.

Now that's what all of them 100% order. Even when I was with two MDs at one point, both of them had the same order. It even came to a point when I went out with some MD for the first time, and I didn't ask anymore what he'd get. After telling the cashier our order, he replied behind me, "How did you know that I'd get that?"

When I noticed that the same dish gets ordered by various men, date after date, I asked one of them why that specific dish. 

"It's complete. It has chicken and rice, then pansit noodles, which is filling to the stomach, a pair of dumplings, then some Chicharap crisps, and a fried dessert," he said. Value-for-money, get more in offerings and in variety, obviously. Tummy-filling, also known as "busog" factor. He even said that this value meal offers more than the two-piece chicken of Jollibee, because of the added noodles, crisps, and dessert. 

Calling the Chowking marketers out there! Insight here! You can get a lot just by asking your target market. And I am not saying that they should target macho dancers only (hmmm... but a TV ad with half-naked dancing men isn't a bad idea).

From then on, I always initiate where to eat. It's been upgraded already to Pancake House, where I'd like him to try what a crisp golden brown waffle tastes like, or to North Park, where I'd like him to taste what a better lauriat selection is. Honestly, good as it is, sawa na ako sa Chicharap.  

Photocredit: http://chowkingdelivery.com 

GB Goer
Learn more: Lessons from Gay Bars in Manila
http://machosandhostos.blogspot.com/
email: char.affairs@gmail.com

Russell's Invitation

"Inaantok na ako (I'm getting sleepy)," Russell*, a macho dancer in his mid-20s, said to me earlier this night. He was seated beside me in his gay bar in Pasay, which at that time had only a handful of tables with customers.  

"Inaantok ka, pero ang tagal ng tulog mo kanina? (You're getting sleepy, even if you slept long the whole day?)" I inquired back, as his shaved head was resting on my right shoulder.

That morning, upon waking up, I received a text message from him, the usual hi's and how-are-yous. I wondered why, at 9 in the morning, this tall, baby-faced dancer wasn't asleep yet despite his night-shift in the gay bar that usually ended around 6AM. He couldn't sleep, he said. Maybe it was the heat of the summer, he thought. Or his rewired body clock. After a few text messages back and forth, I agreed to his invitation to a dinner date that night. The set time was ideal for a meet-up with men in his profession -- after my work, before his. My choice of Chinese restaurant, as he was craving for some yang chow fried rice.

"Sobrang busog kasi sa kinain kanina, kaya masarap matulog (I feel so full from our meal, and to sleep it off isn't a bad idea)," he replied. I had an inkling that these men only have a light snack or don't eat at all before going to work. So a full meal before their work hours was already a huge treat.

My dinner. His breakfast.

"Masarap nga matulog pagkatapos kumain ng Chinese food. (It really feels good to sleep after eating Chinese food)," I responded back, while puffing my cigarette and sipping my beer. I myself felt a bit sleepy, as it was past my bed time on a weekday night. I had to wake up early the next day for work.

"Dapat pala, hindi na ako pumasok pagkatapos natin kumain. At natulog na lang ako sa bahay. (I shouldn't have gone to work after our dinner. I should've gone home to sleep)," Russell said, still beside me, but with his left arm now hanging on my shoulders.

"Sabi mo kasi papasok ka e (Well, you told me you intended to go to work after dinner)," I quipped, taking a sip from my post-meal drink. After our meal earlier that night, I offered to bring him to his bar, as it was just a few minutes drive. I was supposed to go straight home after dropping him off, but my body was craving to see some men in the flesh. I decided to enter the bar with him and stay, as a couple bottles of beer after a full meal wouldn't hurt. It was already past midnight.

I hoped I didn't make a wrong decision, sitting beside this tall baby-faced guy instead of resting at home.

He then invited me, nonchalantly, "Sige, next time, kita ulit tayo. Tapos nun, tulog tayo ha. Sabay. (Let's meet again next time. Then afterwards, let's sleep. Together)."

I sipped my beer again. Another puff of my cigarette. Half an hour later, after my second beer, a few more laughs, and after his solo dance, I decided to go home and get some sleep.

Sweet dreams? Let's see where this goes.

GB Goer
Learn more: Lessons from Gay Bars in Manila
http://machosandhostos.blogspot.com/
email: char.affairs@gmail.com

Dematisse

This past Saturday night, inside 19 East Bar along South Super Highway, I asked “Stewart” who was drinking beer beside me, where he usually went for gimmicks with friends.

This was the first time the both of us went out, outside the confines of the gay bar he’s working in. After months of unanswered text messages and mismatching schedules, I finally got to go out and hang out with him. Ironically, it was in another bar – we ordered the same light beer we’d usually get in his bar, but this time without half-naked men dancing onstage. At least, we were not in another macho dancer bar.

“Nasa bahay lang ako madalas. Nakakatamad kasi umalis pag walang pasok, (I’m usually at home. I get too lazy to go out of there’s no work)” he replied.

“Pero kung hindi sa bahay, saan kayo pumupunta ng mga kaibigan mo? (But if you don’t stay at home, where do you go with your buddies?)” I probed.

“Basketball minsan. O sa mall. Minsan naman, pagkatapos ng pasok, pumupunta kami ng mga ka-work ko sa Dematisse. (Sometimes, play basketball. Or go to the mall. Sometimes, after work, my co-workers and I go to Dematisse).”

Dematisse. That bar.

Yes, I’ve heard of that bar before. The wonderful world of Dematisse.

What happens in Dematisse, after the jump:

Date with a Macho – 3rd Party Perspective

I’ve been dateless since I don’t know when. Three weeks perhaps. This is quite odd since there was a time I used to go out with a macho dancer or hosto almost once or twice every week.

This past holiday season, I’ve been meeting up with friends, instead of boylets. And in two instances, there was always another table with a sight I am familiar with – the date of a guest with a macho or hosto.

Like right now. One of those said couples is just at another table in front of me. (Ang chismoso! Haha!)

How did I know?

First, the age difference is a dead give-away -- one slightly older gay guy (or woman) and a young, fresh-looking guy or boylet. Especially if the boylet is handsome (or above average in looks, kanto-boy-wise), lean, well-built or buff (at least, not chubby), has well-styled hair (colored hair with streaks or Korean-pop-inspired that may give clues on his "profession"), slim-fit jeans, and of course, white leather pointy shoes (but not applicable every time, because these dancers also wear flip flops outside the bar).

Ooh, the boy just fixed his hair, which looked as if it took forever to comb and gelled that way. Maybe, tell-tale signs of his vanity, as you well know how important it is in his industry to look good? (Again, ano ba paki-alam ko sa kanila?)

Second, the slight awkwardness and distance show that they are not buddies, classmates, officemates or barkada. The couple in front of me looks like they are on their first or second date. They are seated in front of each other. No exchange of witty one-liners, no boisterous laughter, no snickering. Only polite chuckles. Quiet getting-to-know-you conversation. The comfort usually seen among long-time buddies seems to be missing.

A third sign is if the older gay guy instructs the boy to order, and then foots the bill. That’s more difficult to observe where I am seated now. (Usisero!)

But if this set-up took place in a fast food counter, the guest would be the one in-line, standing in front of the cashier, with the boy behind his guest. As the guest informs the cashier of their orders, the boy would just be quiet. After the order, the boy would then offer to carry the food tray or find a table for them. The boy "offers his help", as he is possibly nahihiya to the kind gesture of his guest treating him. 

Well, I’ll just give this couple in front of me the benefit of the doubt. When I go out on dates with my boys, I simply want to adapt to the environment or blend-in, and not appear too different from the boy I am with. If he’ll be in shorts and slippers, I’ll also be wearing the same. I intend to to look as if we’re just barkada. If somehow I'd feel like I'm standing out, I'd feel too self-conscious from being stared-at by other people, who might suspect something fishy as to why a mid-20s gay guy is in the company of a cute straight boylet, (and paying for both meals) thus making me feel awkward just by being with him.

Wait, I seem to have described myself, based on what I am seeing in this couple in front me. It takes one to know one.

Pero, swear. Mukha talagang baklita at hosto/dancer yung magkasama sa harap ko!

GB Goer
Learn more: Lessons from Gay Bars in Manila
http://machosandhostos.blogspot.com/
email: char.affairs@gmail.com; Follow at twitter: @gbgoer

The Meal between 7pm and 10pm

“Stewart” and I were supposed to meet earlier for dinner. We made quick arrangements yesterday to meet up tonight before he goes to work. Between 7pm to 10pm

This time is sort of the “holy grail” if a customer would want to meet up quickly with a macho dancer or hosto outside of the bar. They are usually free at this time -- after they wake-up at 6-7 pm and before their call time of 9-10 pm. On a regular day, this is the time they take a quick shower, dress up for work, catch a glimpse of some local TV shows, and grab a quick bite at home, before they head out for a 30-minute to an hour commute to work.

But oftentimes, they would rush to go to work without having eaten anything yet. Once they arrive in their bar, they would either order a one ulam (viand) rice meal from the bar’s kitchen, or sneak outside to eat at the nearby carinderia, or eat a few pieces of pandesal / egg they brought, or suffer the entire night without having eaten anything (worse, they’d be drinking beer on an empty stomach). They’d be lucky if a customer who “tabled” them that night would order one or two plates of bar chow together with their drinks. Of course, they’d be luckier if the matakaw customer would order so much (attention: my friend, “Ringo”) that, as one macho dancer said, with this free meal, “kanin na lang ang kulang.”

So I thought an invitation to dine out – call it either my dinner or their “breakfast” – would be accepted without hesitation. I never got a refusal from any boy who was on his way to work; some of them even invite us out. What’s to lose from a free dinner treated by a customer?

I don’t know, but Stewart never replied if our dinner would push through tonight.   

GB Goer
Learn more: Lessons from Gay Bars in Manila
http://machosandhostos.blogspot.com/
email: char.affairs@gmail.com; Follow at twitter: @gbgoer