Anonymous Text Messages

Have you ever gotten a text message like this from an unknown number:

Niloloko ka lang niyang si Roman (or any other name for your macho dancer).

Your first reaction: Intriguing, right?

Then lots of questions will start to fill your head. From whom did this text come from? Is what this text message saying true? How did that texter know I am Roman's regular guest? And how the heck did that texter get my number? Then that might just mean... is my number being broadcasted and passed around by the macho dancers in the gay bar? Am I that in demand among hot men?

Before feeling all pretty with this "haba ng hair" moment, let me give you some context as to where this text message may actually come from. 

I've heard a lot of stories how fights among macho dancers start. A few are petty ones like cellphone theft or unpaid debt, but most fights are guest-related or girl-related (see previous post on "cock fights)." What usually ends in a brawl or fist fight actually can start from something very minor, like a simple damning text message.

For example, the frequent gay bar customer has his regularly tabled macho dancer, whom he gets for around weeks or months already. The entire bar knows how this customer showers this macho dancer with gifts, huge tips, drinks, etc. Then on one night, the customer arrives but his macho dancer is absent or unavailable, like seated with another walk-in client. So the customer chooses another guy from the selection of men. Little does the customer know that this other guy has some crooked intentions to win the customer. That's when this ugly thing called "siraan" happens.

How does "siraan" work while the new macho dancer is seated with the customer?

It can be a seemingly harmless comment from the new guy, but can raise doubts on the exclusivity of the original macho dancer: "Alam mo, maraming customers na iba yang si Hiro e (You know, that Hiro has a lot of customers)."

Or a revealed secret that can lessen the original guy's appeal: "Si Norman, meron yang asawa e, Japayuki. Tatlong taon na silang nagsasama. (That Norman, he has a wife, a Japayuki. They've been living together for three years)."

It can also be a character flaw, that can make the customer turned off with the original macho dancer: "Bakla nga yang si Tomas e. Nagpapa-ano sa likod. (That Tomas is really gay. He bottoms)." Wait, the "top" gay customers may actually find that more appealing, or unless they know about (and have proven) that fact already.

While the ones above are really very obvious examples, the smart, sly macho dancers wouldn't do the character assassination right inside the bar. These guys wouldn't want to be pinpointed as the cause of any separation of relationships. Thus, they wait for a few days or weeks, or after a few more returns of the customer in the gay bar, to make their move. Their weapon of choice is their cellphone, with a one-peso text message as their ammunition.

"Wag mo nang balikan si Rayver (Don't return to Rayver)," as sent by the daring macho dancer you seated most recently. "Ako na lang puntahan mo. Masaya naman tayo diba? (Get me again. We had fun, right?)" Standard lines of panunulot or pang-aahas ng customer.

The cowardly ones will send an anonymous text message, mostly likely from a prepaid number: "Alam mo bang nakita si Gerald, may kasamang babae na may ka-holding-hands sa Trinoma? (Did you know that Gerald was seen holding hands with a girl in Trinoma?)"

It just takes one seemingly harmless message to plant this seed of doubt in the mind of the customer, you. While finding out the identity of this message sender can be difficult, especially if you've tabled more than three guys in the bar, these messages can really come from anyone -- your bar manager who wants you to pick one of his talents and not your current ingrata macho dancer, or some other macho dancer who just wants your current macho dancer to go down.

And once the original macho dancer finds out about this pailalim tactic of damaging one's reputation, all hell will break loose. With this in mind, the good-natured respectful macho dancers won't attempt to steal another co-dancer's customer by texting their clients. Either they don't want to be involved in a brawl or they simply don't care being tabled by the monied customer. Or, they just don't have any load.

So, will you believe the message? While there may be some nugget of truth behind this message, keep in mind that the sender might only be another jealous guy. You can confront your macho dancer about it, with a message like "Did you ever go out with this lady named Kim in Trinoma?" However, you might just get a lame excuse, like "Nanay siya ng pinsan ko na gusto may gustong bilhing blah blah (She's my cousin's mother who wanted to buy blah blah)" or a straightforward denial, like "No!". Worse, he may think of you as a jealous stalker, and may eventually distrust you and further strain your relationship. But then, you can actually start a bar brawl between hot macho dancers. Haba ng hair mo talaga!

What would you then do after reading that anonymous message about your enamored macho dancer Roman from an unknown number? Perhaps, reply first with: Who u? But don't expect a decent reply after that.

GB Goer
Learn more: Lessons from Gay Bars in Manila
http://machosandhostos.blogspot.com/
email: char.affairs@gmail.com
twitter: @gbgoer

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Photo credits: http://www.mobilephonereviews.org/how-to/procedures-involved-in-sending-an-anonymous-text-message/